Interpersonal Psychology

Interpersonal Psychology is a study of the ways that people relate to others. How we function well, how we struggle, and what is going on in our depths that is behind all of it. Understanding this can help you if you are a therapist, coach, group leader, or work with people psychologically on interpersonal issues. It can also help if you are working on your own interpersonal patterns.

Jay is leading a Collaborative Course on Interpersonal Psychology starting in March 2026 to explore this terrain with those that are interested.

Learn More About the Collaborative Course

For a taste of the material that will be covered in the course, see the articles linked below.

Nuances of the IFS Self

The Self is central to everything that IFS does. Over the years, even as I had profound success healing myself and my clients and group members, I found that I didn’t fully understand the Self. Since I am drawn to theory, I set out to create a complete understanding of the IFS Self. In this article, I introduce the idea of there being two kinds of Self, which enriches our understanding of this concept.

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Capacities in IFS

IFS pays a lot of attention to burdened parts—but far less to the healthy “capacities” that show up as warmth, clarity, discernment, and many other strengths. This article clarifies capacities as Self-led parts (aspects of the active Self), and shows how this lens helps distinguish capacities from protectors while illuminating what parts become after unburdening.

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Protector and Capacity Roles

IFS tends to focus on one particular role protectors play—blocking access to painful exiles so the system isn’t overwhelmed. But blocking is just one of five roles protectors play. This article describes all five and shows how each looks different when carried by a protector versus a capacity. Understanding these roles gives us a richer map of how our parts function—not just in therapy but in everyday life.

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